the joys of parenting

the boy has been lying.

at first we learned it was little things, like the fact that he hadn't been to a scheduled appointment because his dad didn't make it back in town on time (after leading us to believe that he had gone). or that he was going somewhere with us when he really wasn't.

but then it was a bigger thing. like when i asked him if his dad knew of a very important upcoming event in his life. he said yes. but his dad didn't know.

and then the biggest thing. his counselor told him to be platonic in a relationship and he failed to communicate that to the girl.

we had dinner with his parents tonight to get some facts straight and to determine what the punitive response would be. we've taken away his cell phone and computer for a week (at least) for now. in addition, he will soon find that he will not be attending the said above event because he tried to play us and make us all think he was going with the others.

when we talked to him tonight after picking him up after our dinner, he at first tried to defend himself. but it was obvious that he had chosen half-truths at best, and flat out lies at worst. i like to think he felt remorse over the dishonesty.

and there were tears.

it kills me that he is struggling so much. especially when a good part of the struggle is him trying to keep himself from opening up. i can tell he is just bursting with stuff, but he still won't talk.

i gave him a chance tonight. i kept the window of opportunity open for quite a while, but he stuck to the decision not to talk and insisted he was satisfied with that decision. so i closed the window.

but now i am praying that the Lord, if indeed He is prompting him to take that next step, to open up to us, that He would fill the boy with discontent and not let him find a moment of comfort or rest until He is obedient to the Spirit's prompting.

it's so easy to see from my standpoint how easy it is to take that step, and yet i remember struggling with doing things outside my comfort zone as a teenager, too. it's dang hard!! i just pray i can help him and follow God's call as i continue to care for him.

may my dot and i both be an example to the boy, and may we move closer to God, seek Him and all His ways, and be obedient to whatever He would have us do in this situation.

i sure do love that kid. i hope he starts to feel that.