daily bread

last sunday my pastor preached on part of the Lord's Prayer. i was not there to hear him give the message since i was at a women's retreat. but!... because i'm the one who puts the sermon outline and notes into youversion, i got to read the material last week before i left. which is why, by the time sunday rolled around, i'd already been thinking about his words for several days. and i'm still thinking about them.

one of the things he talked about was praying for our daily bread...

We are told to pray daily for bread, basic needs, not for daily cake. In other words for transportation, not a Rolls Royce. By asking for our daily bread, we are acknowledging that our lives are in God’s hands. We recognize that all we have ultimately comes from the Lord.

what struck me about that was that the act of praying for daily bread is an acknowledgement that all we have comes from the Lord. that without Him, we have nothing and we are nothing.

and Jesus said that when you pray to pray like this... this is the very example he gave us on how to pray. and we are also told to pray without ceasing.

so if this is how we pray, and we are to always be praying, then i cannot help but consider that i need to  continually recognize i am nothing and that i have nothing without God; to pray for daily bread without ceasing.

at the retreat we sang a song with these words

I believe You're my Healer

I believe You are all I need

I believe You're my Portion

I believe You're more than enough for me

Jesus You're all I need

and it dawned on me that this song was about praying for my daily bread - it was about recognizing that i am His hands and that all i have comes from Him. and that He is all i need. in fact, he's MORE than enough for me.

and then we sang another song. and another. and they all recapped that theme of Him providing everything we need and that without Him we have nothing.

we kept singing about and praying for our daily bread. it was beautiful!

Article of our trip to Uganda

This article was submitted to both Jon's and my employers for use in their newsletters. We are delighted that either of them would want to distribute our story. And I thought I would publish here, too, for funsies... in case you aren't on either of those lists.


Not many people have experienced horrors worse than most scary movies out there; witnessed, or even participated in, acts that make one question just how far-reaching "is" God's mercy anyway? But some have. And the Village of Hope exists for just such people.

Through Village of Hope they are plucked from poverty. They are counseled and cared for. They are provided shelter, safety, food, community and love. And after those many atrocities they were forced to be a part of, they can finally find the kind of freedom and forgiveness that might otherwise seem unattainable. Oh - and did we mention they are children!

Most are former abductees of the Lord's Resistance Army - a militant group of terrorists based in northern Uganda that is known for its heinous human rights violations, including murder, abduction, mutilation, sexual enslavement of women and children, and forcing kids to participate in hostilities.

That is their past. Village of Hope gives them a future.

We were interested the moment we learned there was a mission trip going to Uganda to care for orphans; that is our passion after-all. And it seemed that every time we turned around we were hearing about this trip making it near impossible to ignore. And so with full hearts and willing hands we signed up to be part of the 12-person team that would spend two weeks sharing the love of Christ with the children of Village of Hope.

This team would become like family to us. In Africa we shared everything from meals and huts to much laughter and even a few tears. But before we ever left American soil we met together almost weekly for three months to pray together, plan curriculum and songs, learn about the culture and share resources and inoculation horror stories. :)

And on August 4, our team-family waved goodbye to loved ones and embarked on a journey that would change the beat of our hearts forever.

The children were so gentle and sweet, so warm and loving. There was no shortage of smiles and curtseys, then eventually, hugs and cuddles. They soaked up every bit of attention and love we poured over them. They sang constantly, in the classroom or doing chores, and wanted to learn every song we knew, which we had to sing with them over and over again.

They live their lives simply and peacefully, but we know that wasn't always the case, and sometimes it was difficult to remember there was a former LRA abductee behind those bright smiles and soft voices. Until we joined them for prayer.

Every morning and every evening the children would gather and sing praises to God and worship him with a fervence most Americans need in a bad way. And soon those songs would fade into prayers, cries out to the Father, wails, even! For these kids have seen darkness. And while they have been rescued and saved, those nightmares and grief still pain them. They are haunted by deaths of parents or siblings, sometimes at their own forced hands. The blood, violence and innocence lost are thick in their pleas for God to free them from their horrors.

Most of the children would pray on their knees with their heads bent to the cold, cement floor, but some would turn their faces into the wall behind them and let out such mournful cries that shivered our very souls.

What do you do with that?

What can some "Mzungus" (white people) from a comfortable, safe and clean (spoiled? indulgent?) life in Allen, TX, do for these precious children? How can we relate? What can we possibly offer them that could be of any real value?

We brought the kids new clothes, some much-needed school supplies, sports equipment and materials to make crafts. But the greatest gift we brought with us was, unexpectedly... us.

They have been shunned by whatever relatives they may have left, shunned by their villages, shunned by their communities. And after experiencing so much rejection like that, over and over... imagine then having someone you don't even know being willing to spend time and money to travel across the globe to just walk with you to the well and sing songs with you and hold your hand.

Imagine the value that you would begin to feel again. Imagine starting to see how big God's love is for you, that he would provide this team of strangers to love you and hug on you and tell you stories about God -- not just through their lessons in the classroom but also in the way they behave toward you and seem to just love you no matter why you have been rejected in the past. Imagine.

They wanted us. They wanted our time and our attention. And in that, was their very happiness.

These children who have seen darkness, who have walked through hell and come out on the other side, have found a God full of forgiveness that can cover and cleanse anything they had to do to survive. They found a God who sustains them and gives them peace. And a God who sends human hands to hold them, human voices to sing for them, and human hearts that will overflow with love for them.

Those are our hearts! They beat differently now. When we're very still, they almost sound like an African drum, softly, rhythmically calling us back to sing for the children again.

Can you hear it?

Jon and Trace
Follow our journey

are you my sponsor?

when jon and i returned from uganda, we began to pray and ask God how we might become further involved with the village of hope and do what we can do ensure these children have a godly, successful future. and one of the things we considered was the child sponsorship program.

in this program, $100 a month can completely take care of one child - his food, clothing, medical and school tuition and supplies. but you don't even have to fully sponsor a child, you can partially sponsor them. you can do what you can afford - what God provides for them through you.

so we prayed about that and talked about it. and several nights later i had a dream.

i was in one of the classrooms at the village, and vicky was sitting at a desk writing me a note. she slid it over to me and i looked at it and all the note said was...

are you my sponsor?

i woke up and told jon we will be sponsoring vicky. :)

so we talked to the sponsorship folks and starting asking about who else we could sponsor. i wish we could take them all! in fact, i prayed for God to provide more money for us to care for more kids. and so, He began to make a way. through us.

we started to shift some things around and to get rid of things in our life that we didn't need but that was costing us money each month. we decided it would be better to do without some things so the kids could eat.

and after many questions and much praying and lots of day-to-day changes to accommodate, we are the proud sponsors of these four absolutely beautiful babies.

the vicky on the left was the one i dreamt about. and the one i wrote about. for some reason she so captured my heart that i cannot let her go. all of them did, i dream of and miss and love all of them. but there is something deeper with her.

they are all a joy and i am looking forward to the day we get to see them again (we're looking at april). and hear them call me mama trace again. and kiss their heads and take in their scents. mmmm! mama can't wait.

it is a privilege and an honor to get to help them and to be a part of their furthering and upbringing and care. but it is not an exclusive privilege. you can have it, too. you can help care for one of these darlings. and you don't even have to fully sponsor one, just partially if it is all you can afford. but you might be able to afford it. do some shifting. get rid of some things you just don't need and provide the basics for a child who needs to eat and wear clothes and go to school.

God has provided for the poor and downtrodden... through us. we are His incredible plan. step up and join us and become a sponsor. and fall in love with a kid or two.

what's in a name?

today it was announced that our church is changing its name from mckinney fellowship to christ fellowship. and while i have heard there are some folks not happy - or at least reticent - about the name change... i love it!

i love that the new name says we are not about a city, but about a savior. and i love that by removing the word mckinney we may extend as far reaching as God chooses to send us. it says we are not bound by geography but rather freed to share the gospel to the ends of the earth (we were free to do so before, but now the name represents that).

and i love that christ comes first. he should! not just in the title but in our lives and the way we represent ourselves and in our thoughts and habits. christ comes first.

yeh. i like that. i like it a lot.

we used to have the full name 'mckinney fellowship bible church'. and i think one of the harder transitions for some people is that the word 'bible' is no longer in the name for we are to be simply: christ fellowship.

my bible reading this weekend took me to john 5:39 where Jesus says...

You search the Scriptures because you think that in them you have eternal life; and it is they that bear witness about me

the bible is merely what points to or bears witness about christ. it is christ we are all about; the bible is a means to him. and so with christ in the name, we have all we need. (not to mention that christ is The Word).

and so i believe that this is a good change. a smart change. a change that tells people what we are about with no boundaries.

me likey.

obsessed with knitting

i'm back in my knitting phase. i can hardly concentrate on anything else. my marriage, my job, the cats - they are riding backseat in my knit-mobile. i woke up thinking about knitting today, for goodness' sake.

it is my prayer that i wake up to God's praise and that i would fall asleep with the utterance of it on my lips. now it seems that has been replaced by knitting. i am so in trouble.

i started this sweater back in march and it got shelved for a [long] while as life took over.

but now i am back into it with a vengeance and i'm determined to finish it by the time it is chilly enough to wear it. the back panel and two front panels are done (except for the accent color which i'm doing at the end). and the cuffs are done and i've started working on the sleeves.

cameron did ask me if i was going to wear my hair like that, too. i had to explain that i am only making the sweater.

then last weekend i was jonesing for some new yarn so i went to the woolie ewe and bought one skein of some gorgeous yarn that matches the color of my favorite long, orange scarf just perfectly. i am going to attempt my first hat and then i shall be truly stylin'.

and i have also finally gotten the guts to attempt my first louisa harding sweater. i bought the louise harding dauphine pattern book almost a year ago and take it out every once in a while, drool over the patterns, and promptly put it away with no intention of starting anything. yet. but it's time. i am now on the hunt for the perfect yarn for this sweater.

and! i am addicted to reading knitting blogs right now, too. (i told you i was in trouble.) and the thing with blogs is that when i find one i am enthralled with i have to find the very beginning and read all the way through every single post. i did that with kissesfromkatie when i was getting ready for our first uganda trip. now i'm doing that with soulemama.

i've also been hunting for the perfect knee high sock pattern to eventually knit my first pair of socks. one would think i would start with a smaller sock for my first ones, but have you ever known me to do so? sigh. sadly... no. i have to do things the hard way. i think i will land on a drops design pattern since they are just delicious looking! although the socks i'm super in love with i have no idea where they came from. but me likey.

sooo... that's my latest (returned) obsession. knitting. if you happen to be a co-obsessor, come find me on ravelry and show me what you're working on. and if you're not on ravely, um,.. why not? it's a GREAT free site for keeping track of all of your knitting or crocheting projects or needles or stash or buddies.